Trauma Bonding – The reason you stay with the narcissist

In this podcast, we explore the concept of trauma bonding and why victims of narcissistic abuse find it so difficult to leave their abusers.

Understanding Trauma Bonding Trauma bonding is a powerful attachment formed through cycles of abuse and intermittent kindness. Victims become addicted to the highs of being love bombed and the lows of abuse, creating a biochemical and psychological dependency on their abuser.

The Misunderstanding of Outsiders Many outsiders, including well-meaning loved ones, fail to understand why victims stay with or return to their abusers. Comments such as “Why didn’t you just leave?” or “There must be something wrong with you” only reinforce the abuser’s manipulation, making it harder for victims to escape.

The Biochemical Aspect of Trauma Bonding During periods of love bombing, victims experience a rush of dopamine and oxytocin, creating feelings of euphoria. When the abuse resumes, victims crash and crave those positive feelings, similar to a drug addict experiencing withdrawal.

The Psychological Manipulation Narcissists use strategies like gaslighting, brainwashing, and isolation to erode the victim’s self-esteem and sense of reality. This manipulation makes victims dependent on their abusers for validation and a sense of identity.

Why Victims Return Victims return to their abusers because the abuser, who caused the emotional wounds, also provides temporary relief from the pain. This cycle of abuse and intermittent kindness creates a powerful, addictive attachment.

Conclusion Trauma bonding explains why victims of narcissistic abuse struggle to leave their abusers. It is essential for society to understand this concept to avoid victim blaming and to provide appropriate support to those affected.

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